Saturday, 24 March 2012

The Curse of Male Friends

Why do I not ever meet new people? Why don't guys approach me in pubs/bars? Because I'm friends with guys.

The advantages of having guy friends:

  • They don't play mind games
  • They tend to have male friends which they might introduce you to if you're lucky, if you're not lucky they say "I'd never inflict you upon any of my friends... or even acquaintances for that matter." Yup, one of my friends (Mr Tech) actually said that to me last night, a few hours before rating me (totally unfairly) as a 5.6, I never asked him to rate me or be a bastard.

The disadvantages of having guy friends:

  • There's always the possibility they might fancy you and one drunken night might ruin a perfectly good friendship. 
  • No-one will ever notice and comment on your new haircut/shoes/dress.
  • You can't point out all the fit blokes in the bar.
  • You will have to take a load of banter, more than the rest of the group if you're the only female. Expect references to the kitchen, sandwiches and poor parking.
  • No other men will approach you because you're the only girl in a group of guys therefore you're either: a slut, a lesbian, a girlfriend to one of them, the girl they all feel protective over. (Even if you're none of these, the other guys in the bar will assume this.)
I seriously have no interesting stories from the past two weeks, not because I haven't been out, I've been out a few times, but because I've always been out with guys. I get looks, I get guys not being very subtle going "aye aye" to each other when I walk in, then they realise I'm followed by a stream of guys and BOOM! chances of them approaching me have just hit the floor. Okay, it's true, I'm not particularly good at being receptive to guys approaching me, but I need the opportunity to improve.

Enjoy your week and wish me luck x

Saturday, 17 March 2012

Mr Media and the skank

Mr Media was out last Saturday with Mr Vanilla :) however that group didn't go round with us, they did their own thing. :( So I had several hours of listening to Mr Argument bang on about his amazing new job (he's a door to door salesman with no minimum wage... how that is an amazing job I'm not sure) while Mr Vanilla, Mr Media and their friends were drinking elsewhere.

"Their friends" include Miss Skank, I knew her from school, and she was never someone I got on with, though never had much of a reason to hate her (still don't really, me calling her skank isn't me being hateful, it's me being a bitch and making a judgement on her). But seriously, she's not a wholesome kind of girl by any means. Her hair is dyed within an inch of her life (and I believe back-combed to get the volume) She's got 'tramp stamps' on various places on her body. I don't usually call tattoos that, but when you have your ex's name scrawled permanently on your arm, it doesn't say "I'm a loving committed person" it says "I'm an idiot". Her eye make-up is so heavy it looks like someone's got a jumbo marker and drawn round her eyes, except a jumbo marker probably would've stayed put better when she started crying rather than the black streaks covering her cheeks.

Why was she crying? Because I upset her? ha, no, I may be bitching right now, but genuinely I have no reason to upset her, and I can be tactful when required. Actually, while her and Mr Media were in the club, she saw her ex (of two years that she split with a couple of weeks ago) kissing "some fat bird" and this upset her... yet she was quite happy to get off with Mr Media. Apparently she and Mr Media almost got in a fight in the club with her ex and she lost a couple of her fake nails. Classy.

Of course they were staying at Mr Argument and Mr Vanilla's place, as was I. AWKWARD. Did not want to sleep in the same room as them, especially as she didn't have a change of clothes so slept in her bra and knickers (He offered her extra layers but of course she refused). I didn't get much sleep as it was, but that was mainly due to stomach cramps induced by too much fizzy drink. I so wish I'd cut my night short.

I'm not angry at her, nor really at Mr Media, more at myself for wasting my time thinking about Mr Media when he's obviously an idiot. Yes, choose the fake skank who's still in love with her ex but will put out quickly rather than the...    ... okay so I'm not exactly a moral authority, but I'm not fake or skanky.

Most important lesson learnt? don't then spend an extra two days thinking you're a failure because some skank has stuff you don't. Instead dress up to the nines, go shopping in painful shoes, get blisters but feel f*cking amazing about yourself, because hey, you've still got it. Even if one guy can't see it, others can.

Have a great week and happy St Patrick's Day. x

Saturday, 10 March 2012

a quickie...

...sadly I am referring to the length of this post, not that I got lucky this week. I didn't. Didn't really do much, won a couple of games of pool, that's about it.

Going out tonight though. Woop! Mr Morrisons (one of the friends I'm going to Ibiza with) and Mr Adventure (the guy I was meant to go paragliding with) are out tonight, Mr Argument and Mr Vanilla may be joining us later (Mr Argument's got a new job so he's working late) There may be others too, but it's unlikely to be Mr Media. Have had my outfit sorted for days. Blue satin bandage dress (slightly uncomfortably short) with butterfly shoes! They were and old pair of shoes I covered (decoupaged) in butterfly paper. So proud of them, just hope they survive. Anywhoos, I ought to be off.

Ta ta x

Sunday, 4 March 2012

Whoops, It's Sunday

So why didn't I post yesterday? Was I busy out socialising with friends? maybe I had a date? maybe I was jumping out of a plane? Nope, nothing so fun. I was ill. Not even the nice sort of ill where you can lie in bed and eat ice-cream all day. Not going to explain what kind of ill I was; it wasn't pleasant nor self-inflicted.

What else have I been doing this week?
Party went well last Saturday, friends enjoyed the vodka jelly. We also played battle-shots, and I beat my opponent spectacularly. In the morning we took a train journey to McDonalds for breakfast (I never go to McDonalds let alone for breakfast) and then walked back to my friends along the coast. Was Nice.

Well I had a job interview midweek, so the first couple of days this week were spent procrastinating the preparation I should've done. Needless to say the lack of preparation probably showed in the interview and I didn't get the job, but on the up-side I now have a new pair of shoes and some smart trousers.

And I had fun with my friends drinking on Thursday. We started early as we were aiming to get home with public transport (started at 5 to leave at 11), obviously after a good few hours of drinking staying out became a really good idea. For once, the drunken idea was ACTUALLY a good one. Ended up in the only bearable club in my town, quite drunk and having to wear my cardigan. I had to wear my cardigan not because of some fashion disaster or weird dress code, but because I'm a lazy single girlie. Yup I had hairy armpits. There's no nice way of putting it, and I'm ashamed. Crashed at Mr Argument's place. Was slightly concerned because he had to go to work early in the morning, so I would've had to explain why I was in his house by myself to Mr Vanilla. Fortunately for me, Mr Argument was massively hungover and didn't make work. In fact I didn't actually see Mr Vanilla at all.

Plans to go out next Sat, hopefully I'll be more successful in pulling. Although Thursday wasn't a total failure, I didn't really want to be hit on by my friend's 30-something friend. He was pleasant, I just wasn't into him (I may be being shallow on this, but if the spark's not there...)

Enjoy your week, I'm going to try not to spend all of it on Terraria (a very geeky game akin to minecraft- I know, I'm cool -_- ) x